Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Reasons why I loathe Wal-Mart and paper cuts!!!

We will start with the paper cuts.......

Now I cant for the life of me believe that anyone on this earth would ever "like" paper cuts....but this IS America, and we have ALOT of crazy people living in this world, and Ive seen the show jackass and apparently Steve O likes them......BUT anyway......there should be no one on earth who likes them because they are terribly YES i realize saying the phrase "i hate paper cuts" is a given. But I thought I would relay why I hate them TODAY.

Number 1. They hurt like Hades when receiving the cut with paper

Number 2. They hurt like Hades times one thousand when receiving the cut with card board ( yea i said card board)

AND FINALLY Number 3 They hurt like Hades times one thousand Katrillion when receiving the cut WITH card board ON THE EAR!!!

Which brings me to why I loathe Wal Mart.....

Why do I do this to myself when I tell myself EVERY TIME I GO "self, we are never coming here again"

WHY is it that walmart has fifty KAJILLION check out lines but never has more than one open at a time...... HUH? Can you PUUULLLLEEEAAASE answer that question for me??

AND don't bother worrying about finding a parking space close to the front, because in order to be a decent human being and return your cart to the proper place, so as not to leave it so that the wind can blow it down the sloped parking lot into someones brand new car, (taking a large breath) you have to walk a mile because they are placed all the way at the OTHER END of the parking lot!!!! And please don't sass me with the whole its not like that at the one i go to......cause what matters is its like that at the one IIIIIIIIIII go to!!! :)

Sooooo how are you going to tie the two stories together, you ask? Well if it weren't for the fact that I had to walk all the way across the parking lot to return my basket, then i would have placed landon in the car BEFORE i returned it then i would have handed him his toy and we would have been all good.....but because we were taking a long trip to what seemed like CHINA he just HAD to have his toy right then. And so maybe we would have avoided him card board paper cutting my ear with his card board packaged toy when i was pulling him outta the cart!!!

Sorry, I'm not psycho, really.....just might need a new ear that's all!!! kidding

I'm done.....I feel better!!

While we are on the subject of WALLY WORLD, i saw the most amazing story on God Tube......get your tissues!!! Isn't our God Great?


Heather@Mommymonk said...

Oh wow - I've had days like that at Wal-mart too. I chased my 18 month old around while my 3 year old stood at the counter with my goods and the checker looked bewildered because she had to wait for me to pay. The little monkey wasn't in a cart because he already had a broken arm from wiggling out of the last cart he'd been in! So, all that to say, I feel your pain!

Staci said...

thanks for checkin out my blog heather!!! I LOVED yours on being a mommy monk!!!

Anonymous said...

Too funny!! I know Walmart is for the birds...Now Target rocks!! We live in Boerne and Walmart is our only choice so I have to "talk"to myself the entire way there telling myself to make the best of's actually grown on me..but I HEAR you!!! I enjoyed your blog..Way cute!

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

Yeah - so this post is old, but I found it and it just confirms that we are SISTAHS!!! I'd like to rag on Walmart next Wednesday, but then I'd have to forgive them, and that ain't happening....