Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Enter Worship

This past week I had the pleasure of attending the "Enter Worship" Conference at New Life in Colorado Springs CO from Wednesday through Sunday. The worship was amazing, and the speakers had a lot of good advice for worship leaders. I do sing at our church home, however I attended specifically to check out their dance ministry. I was a little disappointed when i realized they didn't incorporate that into this years experience, and at one point, I must admit, i started feeling very sorry for myself. That's easy for me when I'm out of my comfort zone....i missed my husband, i missed my boys, i missed my bed :) AND i felt like I wasn't getting what i wanted out of the conference......and then all of the sudden Scott (our worship Pastor) came to me and said :

"Hey there is a girl back there dancing, shes been dancing the entire worship set."

I turned to see this young woman worshiping God with her whole body. It was as if God was saying, "I'm here child, I'm here" "I haven't forgotten". I took a deep breath because it was then that I realized there was a purpose for me being there, even if i felt outta place. I decided to go find out if the Visual Arts Director was planning on being at the conference that week, and the answer was no. However, i jotted down her email address and sent her a message letting her know i was there and interested in talkin with her. The next day i got a phone call from her and she was able to meet me up at the campus and spend some time with me. She gave me some great advice and will be sending me some resources. I am always amazed at how God will make things happen, even when we don't think it will. She is a very busy woman, but out of her love for God took the time to meet with someone she didn't even know. That's service.

I tell ya, It is the most amazing thing to stand in a room with thousands of other worship leaders....the times when the band would stop singing and allow the people in the room to raise their voices to God, it gave me chills.....God's presence was felt so enormously that i wept several times. I am truly thankful for this experience.

After the conference was over we were able to play a bit. Talk about experiencing God....we drove up to pikes peak.....the views were AMAZING. I have never seen anything like it. Here are a few pictures that will blow your mind....and yes, i took them....even the lowliest of picture takers was able to capture the beauty of Gods creation.

This next one is of pikes peak, we were already on our way down, and the gold you see dispersed throughout the mountains is not flowers its trees changing color for the fall.....just beautiful.

Here is an example of some of those trees.

Yes this next picture is real....very real.....how can you not believe in God after seeing this?

Here I am with Britt on the top of pikes peak....it was a tad chilly, and scary...we were RIGHT on the edge of the peak......

Me and Sophia on the way down the mountain.

The other ladies in our van, Britt and Shawn....

Its snowing!!! We all got out of the car and had a HUGE snowball fight, it was super fun. Here i am with soph in the snow!!

I was REEEEALLY excited to get home on Sunday night after a 15 hour drive....and when i did i found a rose on the door and when i walked in a welcome home balloon, a note from my babies and the rest of my dozen roses.....soooo sweet!!

Im very glad i was able to go, but happy to be home with my sweet boys!!!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Okay I admit

I am a reality TV freak. I cant explain why. I. just. am.

Now, I've always enjoyed the "Real World Road Rules Challenge"......listen people i said "Real World and Road Rules Challenge" I don't really enjoy the Real World anymore....cause its not "the REAL world" its actually very far from it.....am i right or am i right?

So anyway, i love it. All the drama, the action packed challenges, its super fun to watch....but then there is the alcohol. Now, i get that when MTV supplies a ridiculous pad full of all the luxuries one could ever want that alcohol would be included. Especially since this is a show created by MTV. BUT I think it is HILARIOUS and somewhat disturbing that when they decide to do a show called "the island" that takes place on (shocker) an island, in the middle of nowhere, where they apparently have NOTHING to eat but rice and the fish they catch themselves, that there would be enough alcohol for someone to get soo plastered that they are falling all over themselves and others...not to mention puking their guts out.

Exhibit A.


Are they trying to kill these morons??

I mean, seriously. We all know that alcohol, no matter what kind, liquor or beer dehydrates....take away the liquor and they will just drink more beer....


lets discuss.

Monday, September 15, 2008

To the Love of my life.......

Happy 8th Anniversary!!

It has been a great long while since i met you. But from that moment, I knew you would be a special part of my life. I remember the day we wed. It was the most beautiful day of my life.

You looked so handsome standing up there at the end of the aisle......I will never forget how you looked at me. When we had our first child only a year into our marriage, i will never forget how gentle you were, and how stressed and worried you were about being able to provide.

And when we had our second child i will never forget how special and beautiful you made me feel, and how you made sure to pay extra attention to Logan so he wouldn't feel any less important.

I will never forget how when our marriage seemed to be falling apart, you lit 101 candles and wrote 101 reasons why you loved me, so that i would be assured you weren't going anywhere.

I will never forget the times we got away, just me and you....and you treated me like a queen.

I will never forget our trip to Disney World with our babies. And how for a moment, together, we felt like kids again.

But most importantly, I am most grateful to you, because without you I would have never been able to receive the MOST precious gift of all.....our lil blessings.....our children.....our family.

Jason, I love you. Ill love you always......

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Thinking Thursday......

And as usual, when i am away for a good while, I have sooo much to talk about its overwhelming and I don't know where to begin.....*sigh*

I guess Ill start with what is on every ones mind these days.....


*BIG sigh*

First of all I HATE politics. Hate, detest, loathe, despise......just plain hate. Mainly because i am a peace maker...I don't like to argue...but i sure CAN if need be. I have this button on the inside of me somewhere, when pushed sends out this angry ugly side of me, so i choose not to discuss meaningless crap like that because it usually ends up bad, baaad i tell ya.

Whats ironic are the words used to describe politic in the dictionary. Words like SHREWD and PRUDENT. In the definition of "shrewd" are the words MALICIOUS and BAD and in the definition of the word "prudent" are the words DISCREET and CIRCUMSPECT......that is hilarious.

Now, i realize there are SOME good politicians out there, politicians that care about the people and our country. But to me, the majority are egotistical, money and power hungry freaks. And its silly to think that ONE MAN can take hold of this country, this FREE country, and turn it into a "better place" I LAUGH when i hear crap like that. It is the VERY laws and constitution and system that has made our country the way it is today. People have their Independence and therefore do what they please, what THEY think is right. We are ludicrous to think that at some point everyone will just agree.....God created us each individually different. THIS WILL NOT CHANGE, no matter what your "slogan" is. "hope" and "change" WHATEV!!!

On to my thoughts on VP candidate Palin....YES i like her, however it is not because i am a woman, it is not because i am an idiot who knows nothing about politics, and its not because I have sympathy for her because she has a handicapped child. In fact that doesn't even matter to me, the fact is HE IS A CHILD, A HUMAN not a monster so that doesn't even factor into my thought process. I'm pretty sure that wasn't a political move on her part......you cant control the blessings God gives you.

I do however like her because she has experience in many facets of life(not without faults but experience none the less) as a mother, a wife, a PTA member :), a mayor and a Governor. She is very well rounded and her moral values are closer to mine than any other candidate VP or presidential.

This however has not decided my vote. And may not even bring me to vote....I just feel the need to say JUST BECAUSE I AM A WOMAN DOES NOT MEAN I'M STUPID. Those who believe this is a political stunt used to draw in uneducated women.....you can take me OUT of that group. I know the facts and I make my decisions based on those.

Now onto something else I've pondered over the last few days. And that is parenting.

Now I'm certainly not going to be getting any MOTHER OF THE YEAR awards, I can tell you that right now. And I'm big and bold enough to admit that I may have been too young to be a parent when i had my oldest. I say that because as he comes up on his seventh birthday, i realize just how much I have learned over the past few years and just how selfish i was in the past. All this emotion is drudged up because i saw a news broadcast that sent me over the edge.

It was about an 11 year old boy who called 911 because his drunk mother was trying to make him breathe into her interlock. An interlock is a device that authorities will put on someones car who has had multiple DUI's so that they cannot drive unless they prove to the interlock they are sober. In lamens terms You blow into the device and if you are sober the car will start, if not YOU OUTTA LUCK SON!!

This genius decided to ask her innocent child to do her dirty work so she could most likely go out and do MORE dirty work.....

Anyway, it was heartbreaking to watch this broadcast because they ACTUALLY released his 911 call the the media (dumb ass child exploiters, sorry I'm saddened that they made his life even more difficult, THIS is why I'm not linking to it) He says things like "she was out all night" "if i hang up real quick its cause she walked in" "i don't want her to know I'm calling"

Then they go on to say she was arrested and he was put into foster care. WHAT?? So his life can be screwed up even more??

They then proceeded to play audio of two similar 911 calls where in BOTH situations the parent was actually DRIVING DRUNK and the kids were out of their minds scared calling 911 from the back seat. WHAT IN THE HELL IS WRONG WITH SOME PARENTS??

I bawled like a baby. To hear the pain in these children's voice was unbearable, and frankly something with which i relate, a distant memory long forgotten.

I remember what it was like to be scared as a child that a parent was going to do something destructive or damaging to either themselves or myself. Having to parent your parent as a small child is a terrible thing with which i would not wish on anybody. It forces the child to put someones selfish needs before their own which causes them to grow up faster than intended or expected. Don't misunderstand, these issues are dealt with and in the past....but something such as this can almost always throw me into a state of self pity. I have to learn to control those emotions and realize its made me who i am. But it has also caused me to look at some of the decisions i made as a young mother, selfish, disgusting decisions that although never put my child in direct danger, could have left him without a mother. It makes me strive to think before I make a hasty decision, because now....its not about me....its about them. If more parents would think about their children first our world would be a much better place.


Man, i don't think i talked much about whats going on with me personally....AH well...ill do that tomorrow.

Love yall!!!!